Advocating for Your Child at School: Understanding Parent Rights, IEP Meetings, and ABA Therapy

If you’ve ever left an IEP meeting feeling overwhelmed, confused, or unsure if you said everything you meant to say, you are not alone. Navigating the school system for a neurodiverse child can feel like learning a whole new language. The good news? You don’t have to be an expert to be an effective advocate, and advocacy doesn’t have to mean conflict.

When families, schools, and ABA providers work together, advocacy becomes a collaborative, accountability-driven process, one that keeps your child’s growth at the center of every decision.

At R&R, we believe parents deserve support, clarity, and partnership every step of the way.

Understanding Your Rights as a Parent

Under the Individuals with Disabilities Education Act (IDEA), parents are recognized as equal members of the IEP team. This means you have the right to participate, ask questions, and help guide decisions about your child’s education.

Your key rights include:

Free Appropriate Public Education (FAPE): Services must be individualized and meaningful.

Parental Participation: You must be included in evaluations, goal development, and placement decisions.

Prior Written Notice: Schools must explain decisions they make, or refuse to make in writing.

Consent: No evaluations or major changes can happen without your approval.

Advocating is not about being “difficult.” It’s about ensuring your child’s needs are clearly understood and appropriately supported.

The IEP Through an ABA Therapy Lens

ABA therapy and IEPs share a common foundation: data, measurable goals, and functional outcomes.

A strong IEP should include:

• Clear, measurable goals (not vague language)

• Behavior supports informed by Functional Behavior Assessments (FBAs)

• Skill-building targets such as communication, social interaction, emotional regulation, and independence

• Plans for consistency across environments

This is where ABA providers, like R&R, can add meaningful value, through helping families understand whether goals are measurable, realistic, and aligned with their child’s developmental needs.

How R&R Collaborates and Liaisons With Schools 

School services and ABA therapy operate in different systems but children benefit most when those systems communicate.

With parent consent, R&R can act as a liaison between families and schools by:

• A parent can ask their BCBA to attend the IEP meeting 

• Collaborating with school teams to align behavior strategies and supports

• Sharing ABA data that helps inform IEP goals and accommodations

• Supporting consistency in reinforcement systems, visual supports, and communication strategies

• Helping bridge the gap between home-based progress and classroom expectations

• Assisting parents in understanding educational terminology and school processes

Our role is not to replace school services, but to support collaboration, transparency, and accountability so everyone is working toward the same outcomes. At R&R, we believe IEP support extends far beyond the annual meeting. Through regular check-ins with school teams and related service providers, we help address concerns early, align strategies across environments, and support progress in real time. This collaboration is especially valuable for students with complex needs, such as Gestalt Language Processors, where ongoing communication with speech-language pathologists helps ensure consistent and effective support. We view the IEP process as an ongoing partnership, not a once-a-year event

Preparing for IEP Meetings With Confidence

A little preparation can go a long way.

Before the meeting:

• Review progress reports and ABA data

• Identify priorities and concerns

• Request draft goals ahead of time

• Ask R&R to help review or explain proposed goals and supports

During the meeting:

• Ask how decisions are supported by data

• Clarify how goals will be measured

• Don’t feel pressured to agree on the spot

• Remember it’s okay to ask for time to think or follow up

After the meeting:

• Review the finalized IEP

• Monitor implementation

• Reach out if supports aren’t being delivered as written

• Request revisions if your child’s needs change

Advocacy is ongoing and it’s okay to adjust as you go.

When Advocacy Needs Extra Support

Sometimes, despite best efforts, concerns may remain. In those moments, families can:

• Request an IEP review or reevaluation

• Ask for Prior Written Notice

• Seek additional advocacy support

• Involve their ABA provider in reviewing data and progress

At R&R, we help families navigate these conversations with clarity and professionalism to keep the focus on solutions rather than conflict.

A Team Approach Makes the Difference

You are your child’s strongest advocate but you don’t have to do it alone. When parents, schools, and ABA providers collaborate with shared accountability, children benefit from clearer expectations, consistent support, and greater opportunities to thrive.

At R&R Collaborative Therapy, we believe progress happens when everyone works together. That’s why we walk alongside families not only in therapy, but in advocacy, education, and partnership. We actively collaborate with teachers, schools, and other providers year-round, so we’re not just present during IEP meetings, but fully integrated as part of your child’s entire support team across home, school, and community.